me: my local dominos has gotten my order wrong the last 9 times ive ordered from there but ive never called to complain and i also still tip the driver $5+ because i know those poor saps are overworked and underpaid
saint peter: ur literally the only person allowed into heaven
I’ll be the first person in hell then because I specifically order pizza on rush hours and I live downtown so I’m 100% sure that they’ll be late and owe me a discount.